his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
