I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
