wanna go halves on a baby?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize