And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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