Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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