There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
