Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
We were destined to go to rehab together
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Can you bring me the toilet please
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
