After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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