so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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