im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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