Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
It's rum buckets o'clock
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
