Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
