This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
