dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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