Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
do nipples grow back?
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