if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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