I cannot find my penis.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
