I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize