Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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