that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I need water and some morals
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize