My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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