i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
