I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize