I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
