i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
