Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
