A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
