You work out of a Hotel?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He better not be in your backpack
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
