whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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