Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
