New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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