real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
