You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I am full of burrito and curiosity
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
