I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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