Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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