did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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