somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
