i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
