Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
