like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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