So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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