I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I don't think brook has ever known best
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
