And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
