Small penises have feelings too.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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