can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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