im about as happy as oj after his trial
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
