I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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