I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
