I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize
