We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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